Football is an incredibly demanding, physical sport, requiring players to be at the absolute peak level of fitness possible. It’s always been this way, but in the modern fast-paced, high-pressing game, a huge emphasis is placed on stamina.
Players play faster-tempo games than ever and face the Herculean effort of playing close to a hundred games in a season including international games, domestic and European cup games and friendlies.
But, while footballers have always been some of society’s fittest people, some outliers are able to make things work on a football pitch despite their larger size.
While these heavy-set players have become a rarer and rarer occurrence, even now in the lower leagues of professional football, the odd player with enough footballing ability/technique can find success despite being about as mobile as wet cement.
There are a surprising number of examples when it comes to players who enjoyed a match-day pie a bit too often, but we’ve narrowed it down to just 10.
Ronaldo de Nazario, lazily referred to as ‘fat Ronaldo’ will not be on this list as he only put on weight in the final few years of his career as a result of a thyroid issue, made worse by career-ending injuries.
William “Fatty” Foulke
I’m going to start with the biggest because this entry is made less of an impressive feat by virtue of the game being so different to what is today.
On 2nd December 1895, Scottish Sport reported: “In Foulke, Sheffield United have a goalkeeper who will take a lot of beating. He is one of those lengthy individuals who can take a seat on the crossbar whenever he chooses, and shows little of the awkwardness usually characteristic of big men.”
Foulkes was 6ft 2ins tall, at a time when the average height for an adult male was only 5 ft 5.
Described as “a leviathan at 22 stone with the agility of a bantam”, Foulkes’s size made him one of the better goalkeepers of the era. At this time, keepers stayed on their line at all times, and wouldn’t start to become more proactive until the late 40s.
As a result, Foulke’s weight and dominating stature made him highly sought after, and rather than cause him to be written off, made him a truly feared opponent.
It is widely believed the still-used chant of “Who ate all the pies” was first used in reference to Foulke.
Dean Windass
Jumping a century into the future, we have Dean Windass, a former Premier League striker that, while far more slight than Foulke, still cut a portly figure in comparison to his compatriots.
A striker who played in the Premier League for the likes of Hull, Bradford and Middlesbrough, he performed well at England’s highest level in multiple stints, making over 700 career appearences.
His antics certainly made him a divisive figure, he was once sent off three times for Aberdeen and was heavily criticised for grabbing an opposing player’s testicles.
But, behind all the controversy, and his stout fuelled figure, he was a good striker. Bizarrely, he saw a resurgence in the twilight years of his career, when he had gone from a bit chubby to looking like his diet consisted of Mr Porkie’s pork scratchings, KP nuts and Stella Artois.
He scored a play-off final winner to give Hull promotion to the Premier League in 2008 while looking like a bloke in a Hull shirt shouting at the pub TV on a matchday.
Charlie Adam
The most recent on the list, making him in many ways one of the more surprising, Charlie Adam looked about 45 when he was 25, and 74 when he was 34, see above. Hardly one you’d consider a combative, box-to-box midfielder, Adam was a Le Tissier type, strolling around the centre of the pitch, spraying balls around the field and striking from range.
But his real talent shone from dead-balls. A free-kick maestro, his set-piece ability was the main reason behind Blackpoole’s shock 2010 promotion to the Premier League.
He scored an incredible free-kick in the play-off final and went on to sign for Liverpool after Blackpoole’s brave season that ended in relegation on the final day.
He’d only last one season, though he would play 28 in the league that campaign before signing for Stoke. In 2015, he’d score from 65 yards out, a feat that immortalised him in Premier League folklore.
Paul Gascoigne
By far the most accomplished and best player of this chubby 10, Paul Gascoigne was a truly marvellous footballer. Not quite as pudgy as others on this list, in his prime he was in relatively good shape compared to his later years. His presence here is thanks to what he achieved despite living off of pasties, beer and doughnuts.
He was born to play football, possessing a natural affinity that was bolstered by a deep passion for the sport.
His talents allowed him to succeed at the highest level, without diet plans, strict physical training regiments and rigorous sessions with the fitness coaches.
Scoring one of England’s most famous goals, and coupling it with a celebration that now lives in infamy, Gascoigne, or Gazza as he was named by the press, was a joy to behold.
In many ways the closest thing England has had to a Maradona-esc figure, he was loved everywhere he went for his on-the-pitch brilliance and infectious Geordie personality.
Even his manager at Lazio wasn’t immune to his charm. The strict, disciplined approach of Italian football seemed a move destined to end in disaster, but Italian legend and then manager Dino Zoff spoke incredibly highly of him, even despite his less-than-desirable body type:
“He was a lovely boy, lovely, such a heart – but a troubled boy also.
He ate ice cream for breakfast, he drank beer for lunch and when he was injured he blew up like a whale. But a player? Oh, beautiful, beautiful.”
Jeroen Verhoeven
Over to the Netherlands, this keeper came through the Ajax youth academy, later making a handful of appearances between 2009 and 2012 despite his large size.
He was often teased about his blubbery appearance by opposing fans. When making one of his few Ajax appearences against ADO Den Haag during the 2010–11 season, the home supporters revelled in shouting “Pizza!” when he gathered the ball or took a goal kick.
He was a decent goalkeeper, however, and took some beating on his day. On another occasion, he single-handedly earned Ajax a point against Utrecht.
After coming on for injured 1st choice Maarten Stekelenburg, he made multiple important saves in the game’s dying moments to keep the score level at 2-2.
Jon Parkin
A man who almost sacked football off at 19 to become a Nursery Assistant, Parkin is beloved, not just for his unwavering finishing ability, but for his humble affable personality and anecdote-filled career.
At 6 ft 4, and weighing 17 stone during his final few seasons, Parkin scored over 200 goals across the 5th,4th, 3rd and 2nd tiers of English football.
Playing for Preston at his career’s peak in 2011, he was considered one of the last of a dying breed.
A great personality, Parkin revealed that his ‘diet sheet stayed in the car boot’, chucking it in the car on the first day of the season, where it remained all year.
He was particularly partial to a cheeky Greggs, regularly consuming an order consisting of: “[A] tuna crunch sandwich, a bag of crisps, a pepperoni pizza, a steak bake and either a bacon and cheese turnover or a sausage bean and cheese melt.”
A career full of highlights, one of his top moments was swapping shirts with Cannavaro after a friendly against Real Madrid.
“He’s won the World Cup and I can imagine he’s got shirts from everybody and anybody and he’s asked for my quadruple XL Stoke shirt.”
Steve Mcnulty
Former captain of Liverpool’s Under-19s Luton’s player of the year in the 2013/14 season in a season where Andre Gray scored 30 goals. It is said that McNulty weighed 88 kg while at the peak of his ‘powers’.
Most who saw his figure instantly wrote him off, dismissing him, but perhaps that was often to their peril.
He was a commanding Centre-back who was rarely caught out of possession, and as much as he lacked the mobility of the modern Ball-playing centre-back, he had a better passing range than even some Premier League Centre-backs.
Affectionately known as ‘Sumo’ while at Luton, McNulty was so much more than a novelty. He was always a lower league player, peaking in 2019, age 36, after captaining Tranmere Rovers to back-to-back promotions.
Had football been a less judgemental sport he very well could have made it higher, and while you may scoff at these comments, especially given the picture provided. But he had bags of ability, and made his lack of athleticism work, making it part of his playstyle.
This body type surely shouldn’t work in the modern game, but as recently as 4 years ago, this man led Tranmere to League Two looking less fit than most of the regulars down the local spoons.
He proved everybody wrong his whole life, coming out on top of all the jeers; all while capturing the hearts of every team’s supporters he turned out for.
